It has been many years since I was fortunate enough to visit
the Islands. Never as a tourist, mind you, just as a sailor passing through
town on the way to other, bigger things. But even though Oahu didn’t have the
impact on me that, say, Hong Kong or Singapore did, there was a certain sense
of otherworldliness that washed over me as I stood there on the starboard side
of the ship on sea and anchor detail as we sailed into Pearl Harbor. I know
that I had never smelled air as sweet as I did that day coming around the bend,
prior to pulling into port. I remember being up topside, above the bridge, with
two local boys coming back home for a visit. I had no idea what the island
landmarks were. From what I recall I kept confusing Diamond Head with
Sugarloaf. My shipmates thought me a Lollo Buggah, a real stupid guy. I am sure
that all the guys on the ship were haoles to them. I didn’t mind. I was a
newbie in the fleet and everything was fresh to me.
But that didn’t matter to the hard guys in Waikiki who felt
they were there just to take advantage of the new sailors in town. I found that
out pretty much right away on my first liberty there. I don’t know why I was
always fired up to find grass in those days but I was. For some reason the risks associated with asking just about anybody for it didn't bother me. Looking back I would say it was a serious lack of street smarts but at the time I was adventurous and just a tad stupid. No matter, grass was my mission and right away I found a local
in a tourist bar who was aching to sell me some of the local pakalolo. I was lucky to
be hanging with a group of fellow data processors at the moment and they were all game to score as
well. The big problem was that the dope wasn’t there with my contact, we had to
drive to go get it. Oh, and yes, could we give his partner a ride there as well? We
had a rented car at our disposal so the ride to fetch it didn’t seem to be a
problem.
What turned out to be a problem was not so much the drive as my inability to read the signs. Oahu isn’t
the Big Island but somehow we never seemed to get to where we needed to go. The
two guys I was shotgunned up with in the back of the car kept saying it was just around the bend. I never
knew an island could have so many. After a hour or so my shipmates smelled a
set up. We had no idea where we were, where we were going but the consensus
vote was that we were not going to take those guys any further so we
unceremoniously dropped them off by the side of the highway. Did we miss out on a beating or a hold up? I'll never know but I was seriously red faced about it.
Yeah, I was bummed, for not only blowing the score but for also looking like an ass in front of my pals. We ended up again in Waikiki and settled up the
evening with a rack of Primo Beer on the beach, so all was forgiven. For me, though, not forgotten! I really wanted to try out a big joint of that Maui Wowie!
Well, I did finally get around to it
but it took almost forty years. Ever since I landed here in Colorado I have been on a
landrace chase and I finally got a chance to secure a bit of the islands I
longed for so long ago. I know that there are a number of dispensaries around
the region that sell Hawaiian landrace strains but Nature’s Herbs and Wellness in Garden City was the first one to have it in stock for me. I remember seeing it in a jar on the
shelves when I first arrived here but I didn’t think too much of it at the time. I was too
spoiled with the holdings of the shops back in Mendo and thought, sheesh, who would want
to smoke a throwback like that? Little did I know that landrace strains were
exactly what the doctor ordered. Once I figured that out it took awhile for it to come around again. Yeah, it took months but I finally made that big score. Last week Maui Wowie was finally checked off the list.
There are many lovely descriptions of this magnificent weed
out there but let’s just say that while the high is not up to the sky my head
certainly took a flight there. I loved the tropical fruitiness of it all, the smooth
smoke, the bud density, nice and light and fluffy. I may not be sitting on the North
Shore watching the wahines surf right now but with a bowl load of this fine herb it’s
about as close as I am going to get to the Islands in the immediate future.
Local lingo!
http://visitmolokai.com/wp/local-lingo-basic-hawaii-languages-for-visitors/
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